In the interest of full disclosure, I write the following previews and scathing sarcasm while also committing myself to 90 minutes of Alien vs. Predator: Requiem. This means you can either interpret my anticipated slagging of half-assed movie productions as hypocritical, or as coming from someone willing to spend time on this direct-to-DVD classic but not willing to give Zohan the time of day. I’ll let you decide.
The first weekend in June just finished with Jack Black beating Adam Sandler in equally cartoonish creations. The reviews and kid-friendly material no doubt helped the movie gain the lead. Opting for some family-to-be responsibilities I had to miss Kung Fu Panda on Saturday, but the critical acclaim seems to be favouring it. The premise looks a little simple, but the directors have done their homework. It has always seemed to me that the most enjoyable movies are made by movie geeks: Steven Spielberg, James Cameron, Peter Jackson, Sam Raimi and Guillermo Del Toro being some of my favourites.
The directors for Kung Fu Panda clearly define themselves in that class, by simply mentioning in an interview that the best experience making the movie was meeting Sammo Hung and Jackie Chan - and especially the seal of approval they received from Jackie seemed to be better than any $60 million opening weekend.
Sharing the same weekend, Don’t Mess With The Zohan is Adam Sandler’s latest in a series of high concept movies with a man-child with razor thin plot. The formula is so predictable that it even includes Rob Schneider and John Turturro. The former is predictable, and the only reason Rob Schneider even has hundreds of millions of dollars earned in Hollywood is because he’s inexplicably included in every Adam Sandler opus. John Turturro, on the other hand, seems to opt out of the indie movie scene for movies that pay the bills. Not that I wouldn’t do that myself given the opportunity, but his skills seem more and more wasted with every Adam Sandler movie.
Looking forward to the rest of the month, M. Night Shyamalan’s next film A Bunch Of Stuff That Happens was shorted to simply The Happening. I guess the earlier title didn’t really differentiate itself from M. Night’s other films. The rated R trailer looks to really distance itself from the tasteful filmgoers and target the Rob Zombie crowd. Famous for his downbeat, unassuming ending instead of the blowy-uppy ending that many audiences crave, the play to mainstream, gore loving audiences might force him to change his formula.
This might be the first M. Night movie I’d be interested in seeing pre-home release, but I’m not sure I could handle two hours of pure, unadulterated gore. Dawn of the Dead was a little too much to handle, and that wasn’t made by a master of psychological suspense. I’m pretty sure I’ll have to wait until I can watch this movie with a pause button.
The new Incredible Hulk movie follows the pattern of getting a brilliant director to make a summer blockbuster, and acting shocked when it developed characters ahead of big noise and predictable plot. Following Brian DePalma’s excellent action thriller Mission: Impossible, the producers opted for a more simple approach to filmmaking with M:I2, giving us a schlocky movie even by John Woo’s standards. I was worried when I found out that they were planning to do this with the Hulk series back in 2004. After three years of no significant development, I was hopeful that the idea had died.
However, as evidenced by the smashed cars and burning busses on Yonge St. last year, the production proceeded and we get Edward Norton replacing Eric Bana, Liv Tyler replacing Jennifer Connelly (a casting decision I fully support), and about every other character that might have been present in the first film, replaced with a doppelganger. The producers have been so thorough in promoting the rebuilding of this series that the average moviegoer is even more convinced that Ang Lee’s entry was trash. I might see this in theatres, but my expectations will match those of Mission: Impossible 2.
I remember looking forward to seeing Get Smart with Don Adams after school every day. Other shows like Gilligan’s Island and the 1960’s Batman were the series I worked through start to finish, several times over between my adolescent years and late teens. I’m a fan of Steve Carell, but don’t count myself in his superfan legion. However, I have to agree with their casting. His comedic style is a worthy successor to Don Adams (may he rest in peace).
Hopefully, it won’t resort to over the top toilet humour in order to capture the Austin Powers crowd. One asset is Dwayne Johnson (aka. WWE’s “The Rock”). More than once he’s played a parody of himself, but usually only on Monday Night RAW. Finally, Alan Arkin as The Chief is another piece of excellent casting. Even if the reviews are below average, I believe this is a movie I have to see. There are other actresses I would have as Agent 99, but otherwise the movie can carry itself no matter how good or bad the plot turns out to be.
The final weekend in June features another formulaic, forgettable movie paired against a kids movie. Angelina Jolie in a… well, there’s not really much more to say since that’s all that people will be interested in seeing. Wanted also features Morgan Freeman playing a two-dimensional character for the fun of it, and a wealth of gunfire, fast cars and digital effects. Almost certainly a good movie to go see after a few pitchers with the guys.
This is probably the most “Summer Movie” so far this year… not a sequel, adaptation from another media or attempt to cash in on a tired formula. Take a couple A-list actors, toss in action, beautiful cinematography, thin plot that can be completely explored in the two minute trailer, and release. It wins as the most original, unoriginal movie so far this year. Kinda makes me want to see it.
…but not more than Wall-E. This is the movie I’ve been waiting for almost as much as Chris Sanders’ next opus. While Pixar has continued to crank out quality films, they’ve never managed to match the escapism of the first few. Ending after Finding Nemo, and starting with The Incredibles, the Pixar films were good but not great. The difference was the writer, Andrew Stanton.
Wall-E follows a strange little robot, inhabiting Earth 700 years in the future after Humans had left it behind as a garbage planet. Side note - there’s a good variation on this set up in the Red Dwarf novels. Just from the trailers and various promos starring Wall-E I know I’m in love with the character. Following the end of the Lilo & Stitch series last year I wondered how long it would be until I found a new character to idolize. Perhaps that was part of my enthusiasm in adopting him for the role, but I really think it’s just about how CUTE he is!
Not a very balanced preview, but there’s little to deter me from seeing this movie opening weekend and loving it. Following this, there’s not another kids-friendly movie being released until halfway through August. Wall-E won’t have the top opening gross for the summer, but I predict it will be in the top 3 summer overall gross.
That’s about it. For reference, AvP:R is a decent movie to watch in a dark room when you’re doing other stuff. Beyond that, very predictable but far better action sequences than the first AvP movie. I’d certainly prefer to watch it again than Mess With Zohan.
Update: It turns out that Wanted is very, very, very loosely based on a comic/graphic novel. I stand corrected. I still believe this currently rates as the most “Summer Movie” in the classical sense of the term.
A bad pun I had to create a posting for just to use it.
